I am amazed by the leaders I met in life. They helped me realized the different between a dictator and healthy great leadership.
I thought I had leadership skills. After all, I used to be high school class president for years. I told people what to do, and they did it. I yelled at people when they were wrong, or not complete the job to MY satisfaction. I accomplished things. I got recognition. I got rewards. I must be doing it right.
I spent sometime in a youth group at a church. I blamed others for not being motivated, not responsible, and not finish the job to MY satisfaction. And I left.
In my early career, good boss to me are the boss that doesn't tell me what to do. Leave me be to find the problems I like to work on and figure out the solutions myself. 'Cause I don't like following someone else's orders.
The first great leader I met was my teammate. He led project, not managing people. He cares about other teammates and goes out of his way to help them success, in their own pace. I always look forward to work with him in a project because I know I'm setting up for success.
The second great leader I met was my ex-boss. He listened, and always find ways to unblock me. He knows how to motivate people: Hey friend, I think you are the right person to help with ... He seemingly give you his trust and now you want to prove that he's right about you.
The third great leader I met is my current boss. He was my teammate when I met him, and I knew he would be a great boss someday. He listened, and gave thoughtful response. In his response, he weight other points of view, and conclude with why a decision is the best trade off with all the information we have right now. He checks in. He helped when asked. He suggested next thing I can do to unblock myself.
Knowing these great leaders doesn't make me feel less about myself. I recognized where my skills are lacking, but that doesn't make me feel less about myself. It's because great leaders make you feel good about the skills you have, not feeling bad the skills you don't. I also know that if I want to be a great leader someday, I can work on these skills. But I don't have to be a leader. I can be in their presents, and soaking it in, learning their skills, just to be a better person, a better teammate.
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